Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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