butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
