He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
