What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Wtf am i supposed to tell my kids when they ask about my first time? "Mommy got drunk off her ass and fucked a total stranger in another stranger's bedroom, then got abandoned by the selfish prick and walk of shamed to the nearest gas station to call a cab, but ended up passed out in a park in a pool of her own puke."
At least mommy was smart enough to use protection and hack into the asshole's facebook account.
Well of course. Mommy may be a slutty drunk but she ain't no idiot.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
