He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
