Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
