i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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