You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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