Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
