this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Enjoy the penises
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
