the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
