Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
PS: I just woke up from my shower
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
