Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize