I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
