ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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