I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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