if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
