Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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