"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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