No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
