the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
