Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
