my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
