I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
