Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
