i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
