that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
