at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Randomize
