She said her name was "party"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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