belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
