Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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