Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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