your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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