just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
