After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
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