I cockslap morals
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I need to sanitize my soul.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
