wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
