If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
