hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
