i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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