He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
