did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
