Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
