I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize