oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
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