My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Randomize
