I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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