the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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