It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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