I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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