you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
