hell yes lets make some ravioli
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I wear drunk well.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
