My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
